little sarah Big World

Support My Mania, Please

Kobe Colored Sky

The urge to create beautiful things is so strong in me. Letters and words, pictures, postcard, shapes, colors, curves, and praise. I want to leave a beautiful mark. Explode into the sky like a firework blossom, and sparks of light float down everywhere.

Colors & Shapes
Delirious with hangover right now, lack of sleep and too many tears. My eyes are dry and burning swollen. But my heart is set to burst. Pen to paper, and I could go for days, unquestioning. To-dos be damned; I want to FEEL, to taste. I want everything delicious, and beautiful, all art.

Tower of Pocky

Maybe these are my death throes. I’ve considered that. But this is what I must do to stay alive. Send it out of me, everywhere, every which way, and be free.

Correspond

~OR~

Things Said, Things Done, Things Made, Hearts Won

Keeping in Touch

Lately: postcards, paper cranes, jelly pens. Doodles, daydreams, dawdling.

Words between friends, and a collective wisdom that has been my saving grace.

Here, what’s been said (altered ever so slightly, to protect those hearts wide open):

“Once you are away from a person all that bad stuff that made you want to end the relationship in the first places starts to get fuzzy, then blurry, then it just disappears into the past. That is when you start second guessing yourself. Did I make the right choice? All I can think about are the good times?? Am I with the right person now? What the hell have I done?!?!? STOP second guessing yourself. You made the right choice.”

“So. Not doing REALLY well, but growing and changing and learning really a lot. We eat super healthy, and run, and cross train. We study when we remember, and play frisbee. We do our own things sometimes (my thing? Drinking while doing laundry and watching trashy movies), and then we come back together.”

“I wish you could see yourself! I wish you could see that you are beautiful and awkward and funny and dorky and intelligent and that you can do so much more in life and find new things for yourself. I want you to, like…get in your car and just drive. Drive off somewhere on your own and start new. Because your place and your city and everything will still be there, and still be the same, when you get back. You’ll fit back in in whatever way you want or need to, and your true loves–family, home and friends–will will adjust around you. Friendships that are worth having will knit themselves back together , or pick up right where they left off.”