little sarah Big World

Tag: crying

Once again I’ve lapsed in my posting. Busy with work, and window displays, just like this time last year.

I’ve also been:

crying (found my tears)

but not throwing up (any more)

not cutting myself (except that once)

hardly eating (silver lining)

doing running-ballet torture-running-biking exercise marathons (“Conquer Thyself”)

*       *       *

Conquer thyself, little sarah, you foolish mother fucker. I love your aching guts.

Too Much

~OR~

The Longest Day of My Life

After my champion death race, I went out to breakfast. Had buttered toast, because sometimes that happens. Because I hate being a picky-pants diner and asking too much of my server. Dad ordered me coffee, and though I never drink more than a quarter cup, I sipped the whole thing down, steadily, as it was hot on my red, raw tonsils.

I’ve long wondered what would happen if I drank so much caffeine. I’d thought it would make me jittery, nervous, sweaty.

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